"I have learnt that if you're too skinny, they'll say something about it.
If you're not skinny enough, they'll say something about it.
I just try to feel good in my own skin as much as i can." - Jennifer love hewitt
Body shaming has always been a topic i wanted to talk about or to address. But i just couldn't find the right words or put my thoughts into sentences. Also, it could be a really touchy subject. So i just pushed it further and further, until a reader sent me message and asked if it was possible that i wrote a post about body shaming. So here it is.
Body shaming is NOT okay. It doesn't matter whether you say "Why are you so fat" or "Why are you so skinny", a sentence like that is enough for a person to feel horrible about themselves. Also, what right do you have to say such a thing to another person? Maybe you do have the best body in the world, but it doesn't make you a better person by putting other people down.
Believe it or not, there has been a person who have said this to me "You know, you're actually quite fat, if only you were skinnier." For a start, how the hell do you even respond to something like that? I think i just stood there with my mouth open, wondering what on earth made it okay to say that? What was going on in this person's mind? I eventually walked away. Sometimes saying nothing is the best thing to do. Who are you to judge someone by the size of them?
"That person is fat, she must be eating mcdonalds all day and sits around all day."
"That person is skinny, she must have an eating disorder and needs help."
Its not really fair, nobody really takes into account genes, bone structure, metabolism or medical problems. There are thousands of reasons why people are they way they are and the size they are. The above statements could be true for some cases, but not for the majority.
Also, i don't get the hype about thigh gaps. Having a thigh gap does not in anyway mean you're having the most amazing body. Why do people go around pointing fingers at others who do not have thigh gaps? People just don't take into account the different bone structures. Everyone is different. Some people just need to understand that and not go around putting people down just because they are not their idea of having a beautiful body.
It's crazy how society has forced upon us what the idea of being beautiful is. Girls all around the world are doing harm to their own bodies just to look like some Victoria Secret model because that is deemed as being beautiful, that is deemed as the acceptable body type.
Some people think it's okay to comment on somebody's body type if she's skinny. People know that calling people fat is seen as an insult, but calling someone too skinny is seen as acceptable?.. No. I think commenting on anybodies weight is unacceptable. Who are you to judge? She might be at home eating all the junk food she can just because everyone is telling her she's way too skinny and needs to put on weight. She might just be drowning herself in fizzy drinks, chips and chocolate, because she wants to put on weight but she can't due to her high metabolism rate. She could just be doing so much harm to her body and others are just oblivious. They just continue commenting on how skinny she is or how she does not have boobs or a butt. Talking about others wouldn't make you a better person or make you more beautiful, more of the opposite so why do you do it?
Even now, i hear people calling others fat. They would defend themselves with "oh it's just a joke, don't take it so seriously." It is not even okay to joke about things like that. I still see boys my age shaming other girls. How would you think she feels? She might laugh it off but deep down she might feel that she is indeed "too fat" and stops eating unless her parents were to call her out to dinner. There are millions of things to joke about and people just choose to joke about a person's body size. Why is that so? Is it just to bring others down? Is it to satisfy their own selfish needs, to bring people down just to feel better about themselves?
Moral of the story here is, it is never acceptable to comment on someone's weight, skinny or fat. Why should you ever be allowed an opinion about somebody else's body or way of life? If you are happy with the way you look, that's all that matters, and if you're not, you're probably doing something about it and working towards something that will make you happy.
"You are imperfect, inevitably and permanently flawed, and you are beautiful."
I hope some of you relate to this post and to the reader who left me that message, this is for you.
Much love,
Rach xoxo
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